For those of you who may still follow me after my long absence, I’m back and ready to get back to some new topics. My life is chaotic at best, my mind is completely off right now, and my heart is trying to heal. Not that any of this truly matters, but I guess splitting with your wife of 13 yrs will do these things.

I have been trying many things to keep my mind busy, but it is just too powerful. I can drink myself into oblivion, and I still only have one thought, why has my life gone on this path? I can surf the internet all day, and at the end of the day, the same thought occurs! It seems no matter what I do, I look backwards now and wonder what I did so wrong along the way to make my life what it is right now. We do reap what we sow, so I’m wondering, just how bad were the seeds that I planted?

But, as with true S.Taylor form, I don’t stay in these moods for long. I’ve been here for 2 months now, by FAR the longest I have ever been in this state of mind. I’m now getting back to looking forward, life is not so bleak. I’m not a horrible person, I’m a good person who has put himself in a bad situation. It will do me no good to beat myself up forever, because the present and future is all that matters. I cannot and would not, change the past. I will know the good things that are just around the corner.

The places I have been in the past two months and the things I’ve done, I’ll keep off the public blog but will give answers to those that ask. Let’s just say, anyone in their right mind would wonder if I was trying to commit suicide by default. And I will say, the thought of death or dying myself, has no more emotion for me than sitting down to have a beer. I seem to have reached a new plateau of thoughtlessness and I, at this time, genuinely could care less if I died tomorrow or at age 100. I have decided that I will no longer be bound by limits that I or anyone else have placed on me. I have never agreed with the conservative society with all it’s rules on how things should be and what you should do, I’m going to do what I want to do even more aggressively than what I used to.

I just got a job offer yesterday, it is in Wilmington, which is somewhere I do not want to be, but, it is work. It is sales and I will make the best of it. It’s been a long time since I’ve been in sales, I’ll have to brush up the skills a bit, but I believe I will be the once famous powerhouse salesman again in no time. ( How’d you like the arrogance there, see, I am getting better) LOL!!!

My biggest dilemma now is, where do I want to live? I have definitely ruled out  Augusta for many reasons: 1. No coastline to visit, 2: Parents in the area, 3: Dreary ass weather, 4: Back to number 2, parents have become VERY opinionated and negative and they have lived here all their life, I do not want to become like them AT ALL!!!

My preference will be Florida, somewhere. I like the Southern Florida area, but would prefer west coast, not east coast. It looks as though I will be locked up in NC at least for a little bit until I get my feet back on the ground. And get this, after months of searching for a decent job, I get one, and it just so happens to be selling life insurance and annuities, and immediately my Dad says turn it down because Obama is ruining that industry.  $600.00 per week to train for 7 weeks, I think I’ll take it for now, make the most of it and see where it goes. If they pay $600.00 per week to train, I’m sure the real commissions will be wonderfully surprising!

Bye for now, will write more later on my NEW life and all the adventures I know I will encounter!!

Just read the most interesting article, http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8132857.stm . The Canadians have just figured out that if you are a negative person, just telling yourself to be happy through mantras will not make you happy, it will probably make you more depressed.

I’m 42, and for 24 of those years I have followed some of the best self help experts in the world. They all knew then that just talking to yourself will not do it. Talking is 7% of communication, tonality is 38%, the other 55% is physiology. To tell yourself that you are happy, grateful, superior, or whatever uplifting phrase you choose to use, must be said with conviction, belief that it is true, and followed by actions that support that new belief and emotion. I can tell myself that I am an astronaut. I can even say it with conviction and fake myself into believing it. However, the moment someone asks me to pilot the space shuttle, my world crumbles around me. Then I feel depressed, scared, embarrased, guilt, etc (all bad emotions), due to the fact I took no action to make my new belief a reality.

Personally, I dove into self help with no guidance other than “Unlimited Power” by Anthony Robbins. For me it was perfect, it read just like a text book,or instruction manual, if you will. That is how my brain works, very logical and methodical. Today, the self help world has gotten diluted with many people who have no idea what self help really is. It took me many years to realize just how to effectively make changes that last. My initial changes did not last. I wasn’t living the life to support my changes. And now too many self helpers think it is OK just to tell someone to tell themselves, “I am happy”.

Now, people looking to self help, should get guidance from someone who has been there, with lots of experience. I advise them to check out the person they are going to confide in. Just as the fact you would not trust your physiology to a quack doctor, definately don’t trust your brain to a quack life coach. They can cause considerably more pain than the physician, because they will create for you a life of complete turmoil, and it may become irreparable.

If you should still choose to do it on your own, remember this above all else, “You must walk the talk!”, if you don’t, you will not achieve your goal, no matter what the goal is.

As far as the Canadian researchers, sorry it took you so long to figure this out! I can give you some lessons if you like!

     I posted a comment on the Care 2 network concerning the delimma of whether or not obese travelers should pay for two seats if they cannot fit into one. My comment was Yes. It is a choice to be obese. Since that time I have gotten a lot of flack about this issue. So much so that it took me several weeks to even decide to write this post. Being true to my nature, I have to express myself here.

     Alcoholism has been tied to genetics. Those that are and those that sympathize, alcoholics, say that it runs in the family. Drug addicts are so because they are predispositioned to be since their parents were before, during and after birth. So here it could be genetic or simply an addiction that you had no choice in, because you were born that way, addicted.

     Now it has been decided that obesity is genetic. It also runs in the family. I say this is the biggest bunch of crap I have ever heard. Scientists are on the search now for the “Obesity Gene”, but at the moment the best they can say is that obesity tends to run in the family. Now that I agree with. I think environmental factors are huge in determining your size, due to the fact that you must do what your parents say and eat everything on your plate. Then parents are too weak to say no when you ask for desert. Not only do they give it, they give a lot of it. Too busy to cook, That is what McDonalds is for. Don’t want to entertain the kids, sit them in front of the TV with a movie or Xbox. Get where I am going with this.

     So, in youth, Obesity is different from alcoholism and drug addiction. As of yet, most parents, will not give you drugs or alcohol. Psychological factors contribute to all three. The more disturbed you life while growing up, the more you will tend toward one or more of the three. Depression and stress are leading causes of obesity and eating disorders. Indeed, obesity can be traced to behavioral or psychological difficulties. Contrary to popular myth, this does not indicate weakness or lack of will power. Do you want to hear that again: “……this does not indicate weakness or lack of willpower.”

     I would never deny that physical conditions exist that do cause weight gain and overall obesity. Cushing Syndrome, hormones deficiencies, and hypothyroidism are 3 and I’m sure I didn’t get them all. And then there are too the antidepressants which can cause a slowed metabolism with increased appetite. A very small percentage of overweight people can claim any of these physical conditions.

     This leads me to my justification that it is a choice. Alcoholics, genetic or not, have facilities and specialists available for treatment, psychological and sometimes physical. A choice was made to enter this treatment. Upon completion, a choice continues to be made not to drink. Sometimes, and a lot of times, myself included, alcoholics make the choice on their own not to indulge in drinking. The reasons they make this decision are irrelevant, the point is that they decided to make the change.

     Drug addicts have at their disposal, the facilities and specialists, to help them get rid of the addiction. A choice was made to enter treatment and the choice, upon completion, continues to be made not to take drugs. Again, some addicts make the choice all on their own.

     Obese persons have the facilities, gyms, weightloss clubs, doctors, etc to rid themselves of the pounds they carry with them. Many obese people have made the choice not to be fat anymore. Some obese persons have made the choice all on their own to change their diet and excercise habits to lose the weight. Jared, Richard Simmons, and Valerie Bertinelli are just 3 of the many people who made the decision and did it. I have seen with my own eyes, obese parents with skinny kids, so is it genetic.

     Alcoholism, drug addiction, and obesity have and continue to be tied to genetics. In my opinion, if alcoholics and drug addicts can make the choice and succeed at ridding themselves of their addiction, so then can obese persons rid themselves of the addiction to food. When it comes right down to the wire, you make the choice of what you eat, fast food or fruits and veggies. You make the choice of how much you eat, small portions or every course including dessert. You make the choice as to whether you watch TV for one hour or excercise for one hour. You, obese person, and you alone make these decisions, it is your choices that make you obese.

     Please understand, those with a true medical inability to control your metabolic rate or cell structure, I am not speaking to you. I wish you the best. I am speaking to the millions, probably over one billion, people in this world that want someone or something to blame their condition on besides themselves. Having become a society of convenience which has contributed greatly to this delimma, we also have transfered that convenience to our mind. It is easier to have a scapegoat than to accept the responsibility for your own actions.

     I am not speaking from a distance here. I was once addicted to crystal meth, snorted it, sold it, baked it. No one in my family was a drug addict, so where did it come from. I chose to do it. I drank for many years, and I don’t mean small amounts. When you wake at six in the morning to get ready for work, and your breakfast is a 16 ounce budweiser, you are an alcoholic. To drink over a case (24) of beer a day was childs play. People used to ask me “What do you drink?”. My response was alcohol. It didn’t matter what kind, it didn’t matter who was buying. I drank like this for almost 20 years. Why, I chose to.

     I was at one time overweight. My BMI said I was obese. I was 5′ 7″ and weighed almost 200 pounds. I now weigh 170, mostly muscle, I drink maybe one bottle of wine once every three months, and I have been drug free since I was 20 and I am now 42. And a psychologist during my treatments for alcoholism deemed me to have a psychological disorder, simply put, an addictive personality. It doesn’t matter what I get into, I get in deep. So when you respond, keep in mind I have been there, done that, and made changes in my life to overcome all three. All by my own choice.

     I welcome any and all arguments to the contrary except, “It is not my fault…….”. Should I see that in your post, I will simply delete it and move on. Should you have a valid argument, my mind is open to being changed.

http://www.thepetitionsite.com/2/stop-dissection-of-live-animals

Nan-in, a Japanese master during the Meiji era (1868-1912), received a university professor who came to inquire about Zen.

Nan-in served tea. He poured his visitor’s cup full, and then kept on pouring.

The professor watched the overflow until he no longer could restrain himself. “It is overfull. No more will go in!”

“Like this cup,” Nan-in said, “you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup?”

     The lesson is seems easy, but can you do what it suggests?

#10 expanding and perpetuating the use of racial preferences
#9 creating new constitutional rights to physician-assisted suicide and human cloning
#8 expanding judicial oversight of military detentions and CIA interrogations
#7 prohibiting tuition vouchers for religious schools
#6 banning the death penalty
#5 requiring taxpayers to fund essentially unlimited abortion rights
#4 creating new constitutional rights to massive government welfare and medical care programs
#3 stripping “under God” from the Pledge of Allegiance
#2 eroding property rights
#1 ordering all 50 states to bless gay marriage

 

     Is there anything you Republicans aren’t afraid of? If so, please comment for me so I can learn. Fear, fear, fear, fear is all that you preach. Take care of me and my own, is all that you believe. There are 6 billion people on this planet, all with varying beliefs. What makes you so much more special? If American, the melting pot of the world, was run by republican philosophy only, there would be nothing but filthy rich white folks living here. I am a white man, and I would hate to live in that reality.

BEWARE OF HE WHO TRIES TO POISON YOUR MIND AGAINST ANOTHER UNDER THE PRETENSE OF HELPING YOU. THE CHANCES ARE A THOUSAND TO ONE HE IS TRYING TO HELP HIMSELF.

Napolean Hill

     Well here it is another week. I’ve learned that if I don’t watch the news, I don’t have as much to say. I think the news is relevant in our lives, but useless. Most news is tainted and the truth lies somewhere buried on someones desk because they were paid not to print it. If you watch other countries news, you find a whole new perspective on how things truly are.

     As mentors always say, there is more than one side to the story. We should take the time to learn the other sides of thought. I don’t mean the radicals side, because that is what we get every day, I mean the real mans story. The one, who like most of us, is affected by what goes on and is not an active player.

     What is the true agenda of the news media? Are they really trying to get the facts out, or simply trying to twist the facts for better ratings and more sales of their particular media? I fear we are becoming to attached to the rhetoric of extremists. This would make us no better than Islamic extremists. We hear of shootings and other deaths related to the hype the media blares out. Yet the media gets little blame.

     Personally, I am wary of the man!