For those of you who may still follow me after my long absence, I’m back and ready to get back to some new topics. My life is chaotic at best, my mind is completely off right now, and my heart is trying to heal. Not that any of this truly matters, but I guess splitting with your wife of 13 yrs will do these things.

I have been trying many things to keep my mind busy, but it is just too powerful. I can drink myself into oblivion, and I still only have one thought, why has my life gone on this path? I can surf the internet all day, and at the end of the day, the same thought occurs! It seems no matter what I do, I look backwards now and wonder what I did so wrong along the way to make my life what it is right now. We do reap what we sow, so I’m wondering, just how bad were the seeds that I planted?

But, as with true S.Taylor form, I don’t stay in these moods for long. I’ve been here for 2 months now, by FAR the longest I have ever been in this state of mind. I’m now getting back to looking forward, life is not so bleak. I’m not a horrible person, I’m a good person who has put himself in a bad situation. It will do me no good to beat myself up forever, because the present and future is all that matters. I cannot and would not, change the past. I will know the good things that are just around the corner.

The places I have been in the past two months and the things I’ve done, I’ll keep off the public blog but will give answers to those that ask. Let’s just say, anyone in their right mind would wonder if I was trying to commit suicide by default. And I will say, the thought of death or dying myself, has no more emotion for me than sitting down to have a beer. I seem to have reached a new plateau of thoughtlessness and I, at this time, genuinely could care less if I died tomorrow or at age 100. I have decided that I will no longer be bound by limits that I or anyone else have placed on me. I have never agreed with the conservative society with all it’s rules on how things should be and what you should do, I’m going to do what I want to do even more aggressively than what I used to.

I just got a job offer yesterday, it is in Wilmington, which is somewhere I do not want to be, but, it is work. It is sales and I will make the best of it. It’s been a long time since I’ve been in sales, I’ll have to brush up the skills a bit, but I believe I will be the once famous powerhouse salesman again in no time. ( How’d you like the arrogance there, see, I am getting better) LOL!!!

My biggest dilemma now is, where do I want to live? I have definitely ruled out  Augusta for many reasons: 1. No coastline to visit, 2: Parents in the area, 3: Dreary ass weather, 4: Back to number 2, parents have become VERY opinionated and negative and they have lived here all their life, I do not want to become like them AT ALL!!!

My preference will be Florida, somewhere. I like the Southern Florida area, but would prefer west coast, not east coast. It looks as though I will be locked up in NC at least for a little bit until I get my feet back on the ground. And get this, after months of searching for a decent job, I get one, and it just so happens to be selling life insurance and annuities, and immediately my Dad says turn it down because Obama is ruining that industry.  $600.00 per week to train for 7 weeks, I think I’ll take it for now, make the most of it and see where it goes. If they pay $600.00 per week to train, I’m sure the real commissions will be wonderfully surprising!

Bye for now, will write more later on my NEW life and all the adventures I know I will encounter!!

     Man has had a selective focus on character from the beginning. In the middle ages, it became a way of doing business. Honor and character, if not found, would not be returned. Then came chivalry, whereby even if a man was dishonorable, others would still be honorable themselves. Nowadays, the question has truly become, “is this character, or am I being duped?”

     I’ve always prided myself on being abe to read people so as not to get duped. Having been a salesman for so long, I became very good at doing so. So good in fact, I was generally never wrong (97%). Then something happened, I began to let down my guard and trust people and developed a little scheme to figure people out. Usually people will ask something of you, give more than what was asked for and allow them to make all the gratuitous promises that most people will not fulfill in return. If they return the favor, then thy are honorable people. If not, then I know and will treat them differently from then on.

     Unfortunately, most people are not honorable, but some are so sneaky as to make themselves appear so, then stab you in the back. My co-worker is one of those people. Upon all meeting with him, he seems like such a great guy. Doing favors for you, standing up for you when the chips are down, aleays there for you. Behind your back it is another story altogether. He is 100% CYA (cover your own ass).

     Well, I’ve known this for sometime, so I’ve been sure to not cause any waves and stay out of the limelight. He is so dishonorable, that he is stabbing you anyway. This past job we were on took longer than expected. He planned it poorly, materials came in waves (getting only half what is needed for any project), he only worked on this job 1.5 days, and although the house didn’t change from the beginning, he forgot to put things on the to-do list so the list kept getting longer and longer. Since the timeline laid out was at the beginning, of course we ran over schedule.

     Not to keep bashing him, you can see where I am going. He clearly was a major factor in the job being behind. This is where the story gets good. My partner and I had some days off during the job, myself 2 days and him the equivalent of 1 (2 half days). Could you even imagine that over the course of 3.5 weeks, the bosses were led to believe that these 3 days of missed labor caused the job to run over by 1.5 weeks. It was all our fault.

     I found out by needing materials and having to purchase them myself, since he was unable to do his job and get them for us. When I returned to the office for reimbursement 1.5 hours later, he was still there sitting on his ass doing nothing. When I made a comment about it, I saw it, that one thing no one can deny when it happens. Their face and eyes are the exact same as an animal when surprised and fearful. On humans it is a sight to see, because they struggle so hard to hide it and you can see their veins bulge from the effort.

     A comment was then made by our office manager, in reference to when the job would be finished. As she rubbed her eyes and forehead she said, “You guys are killing me!” I immediately retorted, “Me and Dale?” And wouldn’t you know her answer was yes. I was livid and proceeded to tell her just why the job was behind and He (my supervisor) was scared to death of what I was saying and immediately started chiming in and backtracking so as to cover his ass.

     Do I take this up the chain of command? I think I will simply because this is the third time that I know of him doing this to me. This time I going to use the skills I’ve so long ago put aside, and I will destroy him. Just as in the days of chivalry and honor, I will beat down the dishonorable man by letting the world know what he is about.

BEWARE OF HE WHO TRIES TO POISON YOUR MIND AGAINST ANOTHER UNDER THE PRETENSE OF HELPING YOU. THE CHANCES ARE A THOUSAND TO ONE HE IS TRYING TO HELP HIMSELF.

Napolean Hill

     Well here it is another week. I’ve learned that if I don’t watch the news, I don’t have as much to say. I think the news is relevant in our lives, but useless. Most news is tainted and the truth lies somewhere buried on someones desk because they were paid not to print it. If you watch other countries news, you find a whole new perspective on how things truly are.

     As mentors always say, there is more than one side to the story. We should take the time to learn the other sides of thought. I don’t mean the radicals side, because that is what we get every day, I mean the real mans story. The one, who like most of us, is affected by what goes on and is not an active player.

     What is the true agenda of the news media? Are they really trying to get the facts out, or simply trying to twist the facts for better ratings and more sales of their particular media? I fear we are becoming to attached to the rhetoric of extremists. This would make us no better than Islamic extremists. We hear of shootings and other deaths related to the hype the media blares out. Yet the media gets little blame.

     Personally, I am wary of the man!